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Love Over Fear

Love Over Fear

In our first blog post, our counsellor, Ali, talks about conquering fear with love. We’d love to hear your thoughts in the comments section.

I’ve been toying with the idea of starting a blog for some time now – but I wasn’t really sure what I wanted to write about, and how to tie it in with what we do here at Integrate hk. Well, today (while drinking my second coffee) I had a revelation. I suddenly felt compelled to write about love. Not romantic love. Human love. The love that people show for one another, regardless of who they are, where they’re from, what their story is, even whether or not they know each other. This type of love is kindness, care, compassion. Empathy.

As a counsellor, love is the crux of what I do. The place it comes from. The very heart of it. I don’t need to know my clients to love them. That is, to treat them with kindness. To care for them and show them compassion. To listen with an ear and an attitude brimming with empathy and Unconditional Positive Regard (thanks Carl Rogers!).

But I don’t want to talk about my clients or even my practice here (ethical issues aside!). The idea to write about love came from me thinking about fear. When I think about the things that are going on in the world at this moment in history, I am filled with dread and fear. Most of these events don’t affect me directly, but they still affect me. I’m saddened for the people that are being turned away from help because of where they’re from – because of fear. I am despairing for the displaced, the unloved and the unlovable. Fear and hate seem to be sweeping the world right now, so I figured the only way I can counter that in one small, but hopefully effective way, is to love. To show love, to talk about love, to encourage love.

This quote from Fred Rogers really resonates with me. Looking for the helpers is looking for the people acting in love. When we look for the helpers, we shift our focus from hate to love. And when we seek out love, we find love in little, every day things.

Lately I’ve been seeing love in the kind acts of friends – an offer of help, an encouraging word, a timely message. I’m trying to show love by doing the same for friends. For strangers, I’m trying to remember to do little things like smile when I meet someone’s eye, give up my seat on the train to someone who needs it more. Let people in when there’s traffic. When you shift your focus, where are you seeing everyday signs of love? How are you spreading love in small ways?